Skip to main content

Dear Little Cousin...

Ok, so I know that you probably think I've been neglecting this blog, but I haven't.  I've had so many ideas for entries, but I am paralyzed with fear of offending people or seeming boring.  I know this is lame.
I always come around to the following thoughts re: this blog:
1) Why the ef does anyone care what I have to say about anything?
2) Someone has probably written about this before, and probably done it in a much better researched  manner - so, refer to #1.
3) What if A, B, and C totally disagree with me and think I'm a total bitch because I thought that?

With that in mind, here are some blog ideas of the past few weeks that I have NOT written:
A) Being a grown-up
B) Cats vs. Dogs
C) Why waiting is good
D) Body image and fitness (inspired by my young cuz Riti)
E) Fashion and why it's important (inspired by Ryan who claims the opposite to be true)
F) Unemployment and finding Kate 2.0
E) Worst dates ever
F) Why politics suck

If you could please vote on these or give me some more ideas, I would be happy for your inspiration.

However, since it was my cousin Alden who inspired me to write this time, I've decided to devote a blog entry to her.

Alden is my mom's cousin's daughter, so I think that makes her either:
i) My second cousin
ii) My first cousin once removed

Anyway, Alden is basically a precocious young teen who is also an only child, so I feel such a warmth in my heart when she asks me for advice or writes me to tell me about what's going on in her life.  She told me that she loves my blog - which makes me dizzy with joy - and asked that I write more.

Well, Alden, this is for you.
This blog entry is older-sister-esque advice about your teen years.

**************************************************************************

First - Know that almost every kid around you is basically insecure and figuring themselves out.  This means that if someone is mean to you, they are probably jealous of you...especially girls, because girls can be so mean to each other and it's all based entirely on jealousy and low self-esteem on their part.  It also means that there are probably plenty of boys who like you, but who might be nervous to tell you this.  It also might mean that there are times when you feel insecure and you might say something mean about someone behind their back.  We all do it, but just understand that it comes from this place of fear and insecurity.  When you look back at the interactions that you had in junior high and early high school that were negative, you will see quite clearly that the people involved were simply not as mature or sure of themselves as you were.

Second - Hold off on having a Facebook profile...simply because of the statements written above.  I have heard more horrible stuff about teens on facebook than I care to recall.  My friends and I talk about what it would have been like to have facebook profiles when we were in junior high and high school and it petrifies us.  I'm sure you know all about the whole bullying agenda, but facebook makes it so easy.  So, I'd wait until you're,  like, 16 or something.

Third - Know that at your age, you look better without makeup.  I am not going to come down against makeup because I think it's awesome and I love it so much.  However, I think that what young teen girls don't realize is that they are existing in one of the most beautiful times of their lives - which is right before puberty really hits home and potentially really messes up your skin.  Before this happens, you glow like a bright, beautiful flower, and makeup only covers this precious beauty.  Also, young girls look so trampy in lots of eyeliner.  If you feel the need to experiment with makeup, please have fun doing so at home, but attempt to put off wearing any in public until you absolutely can't hold off any more.  At that point, I recommend blush, mascara and lip gloss ONLY.  Save eyeliner for school dances and college.

Fourth - With regard to my third point, I want to discuss beauty products.  You need to understand that you are being heavily marketed to.  Beauty companies are trying to get you hooked on their products early so that you always use them.  I think it's ok to be influenced by marketing, but only if you're aware that it's happening.  Like, when I was a teen, I absolutely had to get this particular kind of deodorant because it was called Teen Spirit (I think).  I was under the (false) impression that I needed Teen Spirit because I was a teen.  There is no real difference between Teen Spirit and regular deodorant, besides maybe the fragrance.
I love beauty products, and again will not come down against them.  However, I feel the need to educate you a bit so that you are not confused.

For your face: Do not use acne products unless you actually have acne.  I made this mistake and it                   dried my skin out so badly.  Those Clean and Clear products?  They have salicylic acid and benzoic acid in them.  Those things purposefully dry out your skin so that the acne will also dry out.  Benzoic acid tends to be much stronger than salicylic acid.  If you have a breakout, try the products with salicylic acid first and use it until the breakout goes away.  Then go back to a facial cleanser.  Don't use regular soap on your face either.  I'm sorry, but don't.  It will make your skin break out more and will also make it dry.  For a facial cleanser, I recommend something really simple, like Neutrogena.  Also, it is a common misconception that moisturizing your face will make it break out.  This simply is not so.  Moisturizing your face will make your skin healthy and supple and thus less prone to issues.  Thus, I recommend using a facial moisturizer with SPF in it.  You are never too young for sunscreen.  Again, I'd go for Neutrogena.

For your body: If you tend to get itchy, use moisturizer.  I CANNOT STRESS MOISTURIZER ENOUGH.  It will keep your skin so soft and more wrinkle free later in life.  I've had guys tell me I have the softest skin, and it's totally because I moisturize every night and have been doing so since I was 8 (eight) years old.  If you get a breakout on your chest or your back, try the salicylic acid soap again.  You do sports, so you probably wear a sports bra, which gets sweaty and can harbor bacteria and exacerbate chest and back acne.  Therefore, you'd be doing yourself a favor to immediately take off the sports bra and take a shower after sweating.  This will help any breakout issues immensely.
And finally, learn how to use OB tampons when you are ready.  This will be a life-long investment.  They can be stored very easily because they are tiny and do not take up space.  Also, they are much better for the environment.

So, in conclusion re: products - use moisturizer, don't use acne products you don't need, and use OB tampons.

Fifth: Don't drink until you are adult enough to handle it.  Just don't.  I realize this is somewhat unrealistic because most teens have their first experience when they are in high school, but alcohol just gets you into trouble.  People who drink too much alcohol just make really dumb decisions that they later regret.  I didn't have any alcohol until the summer after my senior year of high school, and I don't regret this decision.

********************************************************************************
Ok, that is all the advice I think you can absorb for one session, Alden.
I hope that this was useful to you, and to all you viewers out there who do not moisturize regularly!

I shall think of some more ideas for the next entry.

Tata for now.





Comments

Popular posts from this blog

The Great Baby Debate

Hello everyone. There has been something on my  mind for quite some time, and I think it's about time to hash it out with ya'll. Babies I've had several conversations recently with people sans babies who are questioning whether they really want to get themselves into the situation of having babies.  I count myself as one of these people. The problem is that the longer you allow yourself to be sans-baby, the more chances you have to watch how the lives of people with babies change.  As an outsider, you witness the reality of a situation wherein your friends' lives are basically usurped by the baby.  Your own situation, with its privacy, sleeping in, personal time and extra spending money starts to look awfully appealing, and you aren't sure you want to let it go. Maybe this sounds selfish, but I don't see it that way.  I think it's just about what kind of life you want to have. From my perspective right now, here's how I see it. Having a baby, p...

"Welcome to Motherhood" - An all encompassing guidance manual

Hi guys,  Thanks to Clive Higgins for his suggestion on the title for this blog post. In this post, I shall attempt to summarize what I have learned so far about new motherhood. Let's start though, with the fact that I'm tired.  I'm bone-deep, in another world tired.  It doesn't matter how much help I get (and I have a LOT of help)...this tiredness makes me feel like I'm not actually here.  I'm really deep inside my head somewhere, sort of swimming up toward the surface.  When people talk to me, I try to find the appropriate words sometimes and they won't come.  I told Ryan the other day that I could probably lie down in the median of the highway, up against the metal divider in the dirty grass with the plastic cups and detritus all around me and fall soundly asleep.  I think maybe it is starting to get slightly better, but I'm unsure.  Really, I should be sleeping now and not writing this blog post.  But it feels so good to do somethi...

Cats vs. Dogs

I don't know.  I've been thinking about this recently and decided to put my thoughts down on paper. A million people are excited to talk to you about how dogs are better than cats or cats are better than dogs or they are equal or they hate all animals or whatever.  Although...what kind of person hates animals?  I don't know. The point is, I don't believe that one is better than the other.  But, I do firmly believe that there are cat-people and dog-people and that I am a cat-person.  I'd like to discuss this. But first, I did actually read an article on this subject a while ago which made some interesting points on why some people are cat-people and some people are dog-people and I think it made a hell of a lot of sense.  Do I remember what this article said?  Not really.  But it made a lot of sense at the time. Let's get into it. I am a cat person.  I think it may be genetic.  I can remember loving cats since before Andy Sydney...